I Believe
by FrogE
Summary: What if "The Four Percent Solution" had turned out differently. Warning: character death.


Disclaimer: I don't own JAG or its characters. I don't have money, so don't sue me.

Summary: What if "The Four Percent Solution" had played out differently? My first fic, so be nice.

* * *

He wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there. Of course, Mac could have told him, but…. Mac… his thoughts stopped there. Somehow, he could feel her there with him, and his mind raced back to that fateful night.

_Every now and then soft as breath upon my skin  
I feel you come back again_

_And it's like you haven't been gone a moment from my side_

_Flashback_

He sped as fast as he could down the road. He'd received a call from the police. There had been a car accident. It was Mac. They wouldn't tell him anything, just that he needed to get to the hospital.

"Please," he prayed, "Let her be ok."

Rushing into emergency, he quickly approached the desk. "Hi, I'm Harmon Rabb. I got a call from the police. Has there been a 'Sarah Mackenzie' brought in." He waited for the nurse to check.

"Yes, Mr. Rabb, there was a 'Sarah Mackenzie.' I'll let the doctor know you're here. Why don't you have a seat over there while you wait, sir," the nurse said pointing to the row of cushioned chairs nearby.

After what seemed like forever, he noticed a man about his age in white lab coat walking toward him. The somber look on his face didn't go unnoticed. "Mr. Rabb?" the doctor asked.

"Yes, sir, that's me. How is she? Is she OK? Can I see her?" Harm asked without so much as a breath.

"Mr. Rabb," the doctor began, "From what I understand, she was asking for you at the scene of the accident," "Are you family?"

"I'm the closest thing she's got to family," Harm answered, "I'm listed as her next of kin."

"Mr. Rabb, I wish I had better news," the doctor continued. "We've done everything we can, but we don't think she'll make it through the night." Harm's face fell, and it felt like someone had punched him in the stomach. He couldn't breathe. The doctor continued. "I'll show you to her room. I'm assuming you'll want to stay with her. She's still barely hanging on."

"Yes, I would like to see her doctor."

In Mac's room 

He was shocked at how banged up she really was. There were tubes and wires everywhere. The beeping of the heart monitor rang throughout the room. He sat next to her, taking her hand in his. "Please, Mac, I need you. Please don't leave me." She opened her eyes.

"Harm," she barely whispered. She couldn't get much breath. "… wasn't paying attention. I'm sorry Harm."

"SHHH," he said trying to keep her from talking too much. "Try and hang on for me, please," he begged, sobbing every word. She wouldn't listen.

"Harm, I'm sorry," she whispered as she cried, too.

_Like the tears were never cried_

"I never told you that…" she tried to catch her breath, "…that, I love you, flyboy."

"Mac," he sobbed, "I love…" At that moment the incessant beeping of the heart monitor screamed louder as it flat lined. He felt her hand go limp in his. "Mac," he sobbed, "Sarah, please, NO." One of the nurses came in and turned the machine off. He continued to sob. "Sarah, I love you too," he whispered, his voice cracking.

_Like the hands of time are holding you and me  
And with all my heart I'm sure we're closer than we ever were  
I don't have to hear or see, I've got all the proof I need  
There are more than angels watching over me  
I believe, I believe_

_End Flashback_

He wiped away the tears that had been running down his cheeks. She was gone. In fact, she'd been gone over a year now. He thought back over the past year. How many times had he walked into JAG headquarters expecting Mac to chide him about being late again, just to remember that she wasn't there? There were those other times though, like that murder trial. He wasn't sure how he was going to manage to defend his client. He knew he wasn't guilty, but not one shred of evidence pointed that way, but he had found a way. It was like she had been with him, had helped him. He couldn't really explain it. Then there had been the birth of the Roberts twins. That was especially hard, since she was supposed to be their Godmother. He could almost sense her at the christening, though, when they said a small tribute.

_That when you die your life goes on  
It doesn't end here when you're gone  
Every soul is filled with light  
It never ends and if I'm right  
Our love can even reach across eternity  
I believe, I believe_

After what seemed like hours, he finally got the courage to say what he'd come to say. "Mac, Sarah," he started, "It's been over a year, but sometimes it seems like it was just a few hours ago. Sometimes, though, I actually find myself happy. I guess that has a lot to do with Kristen. She came to JAG a few months ago. I think you would have liked her. I guess I'm kinda beating around the bush here." He took a deep breath. "We've been seeing each other for the past few weeks. She's amazing, It's like I've known her forever. It's still hard, though. I know you would want me to move on, so that's what I'm trying to do. But no matter what, you'll always have a piece of my heart. I could never forget you or what we had that we could never quite name.

_Forever, you're a part of me  
Forever, in the heart of me  
And I'll hold you even longer if I can_

"I've gotta go now," he said, looking at his watch. "By the way, thanks for last week," he added, remembering…

_Flashback_

He'd been flying his carrier quals. Like always, something went wrong. The landing instruments malfunctioned. He'd tried to eject, but the ejection handles had somehow malfunctioned as well, but somehow, he'd gotten that plane safely back to the carrier. Others said he was crazy, believing in ghosts, but he knew it had been her. She'd probably enlisted help from his dad as well.

_End Flashback_

_The people who don't see the most  
Say that I believe in ghosts  
And if that makes me crazy, then I am  
'Cause I believe_

He got up and started walking back to his car. He turned and looked back at where she lay.

_**Lt. Colonel Sarah Mackenzie**_

_**Beloved niece, friend, and soul mate**_

**_Semper Fi_**

"I'll always love you, Sarah," He whispered.

There are more than angels watching over me  
I believe, I believe

AN: The song is "I Believe" by Diamond Rio. I know this is kinda dark for a first fic, but it just kinda came to me when I was watching the video. Review. Tell me what you think. Again, this is my first fic. No flames please. Constructive criticism is welcome, although I can't see myself writing a lot more fics. I usually just read, and eventually someone writes a plot similar to the one I've been dreaming up in my head, but I just couldn't wait on this one.


End file.
